Jeremy's Weblog

I recently graduated from Harvard Law School. This is my weblog. It tries to be funny. E-mail me if you like it. For an index of what's lurking in the archives, sorted by category, click here.

Tuesday, August 19, 2003

Here's an exercise in stupidity. 26 made-up law firm perks, each starting with a different letter of the alphabet.

Air Conditioning, sometimes
Business Casual Dress One Day Each Month
Caffeine, and lots of it
Doors All Have Doorknobs
Extra-Large Paychecks, like on Publishers Clearing House Commercials
Free Food on Fridays
Gym In Building, Equipped With Laptops at each machine so you can work
Hardly Any Blackouts
Indentured Servants At Your Service
Jelly Beans Occasionally Found Rolling On The Floor
Killing Sprees Strongly Discouraged
Late-Late-Night Laundry Service
Money Just Lying Around In Stacks Around The Office, Free For the Taking
Newspapers Available For Just Fifty Cents in the Lobby
Old Man Takes Your Coat
Photocopies for Phree
Qatar Office Sponsors Free Trips
Room Under Your Desk To Sleep
Subsidized Salad
Taxi Rides Home After 3 AM
Underwear with the Firm's Logo Imprinted On It
Vacation Time Does Not Decrease As You Remain At Firm
Wastepaper Baskets Emptied Almost Weekly
X-Rays Included in Medical Coverage
Yale Graduates Forced To Clean Toilets
Zipper Repair, free on Tuesdays