My laptop is stupid. It doesn't know it's daylight savings time. Every other computer on the whole planet knows to change the clock, and my computer doesn't. Stupid. Almost as stupid as my watch, which keeps inexplicably getting faster and faster. I set it to be three minutes fast about three months ago. It's nine minutes fast now. Well, an hour and nine minutes fast. But the hour is because of daylight savings time obviously. Stupid computer. I have to manually change the time now. And then probably tomorrow it'll remember it should've changed and it'll be an hour behind.

Check out Diary of a Stand-Up Comedian for a really, really, really compelling take on the life of an aspiring stand-up comic. It's really human. That's the best word I've got for it. I stumbled onto it through a confluence of links I clicked on, and just read the entire site over the past couple of hours. There's a lot of words there. I generally don't particularly like most of what I read, especially when it's just some random person's weblog (but of course I'm glad your standards are low enough to come visit mine... :). This I couldn't bring myself to stop reading. Read it.

Tomorrow I get to experience the first of a handful of "callback lunches." These are, not to be obvious, lunches that firms take you on if you have a morning callback. Two associates and me at this one that I've got tomorrow. I'm confident the restaurant they take me to will at least be decent, hopefully more. When I was on the phone scheduling they asked if I had any dietary restrictions. I was tempted to make something up. "Can't eat anything orange" could be kind of funny to see if they could work around. "Strict carnivore; no vegetables" would be a pretty solid ticket to a steakhouse I guess. "Allergic to anything that begins with the letter 'B'" would test them pretty well. "Only foods with three syllables" would start to sound like an improv comedy game.

Five Things I Probably Shouldn't Eat At Lunch Since I Only Have One Suit and One Dress Shirt That Doesn't Already Need a Cleaning

1. Anything with a red sauce
2. Anything with any sauce at all
3. Anything with any liquid ingredients
4. Anything with any substance that could potentially stick to me
5. Anything with any color

I'll be enjoying ice and plastic for lunch. Perhaps some broken glass for dessert.

Four Foods I Wish I -- (naw, make that "Everyone") -- Was Allergic To

1. Brains
2. Feet
3. Mayonnaise
4. Cauliflower