Jeremy's Weblog

I recently graduated from Harvard Law School. This is my weblog. It tries to be funny. E-mail me if you like it. For an index of what's lurking in the archives, sorted by category, click here.

Thursday, December 04, 2003

OK. A day spent with my Constitutional Law casebook, the 2003 supplement, the syllabus, and a big giant spreadsheet has yielded the following discovery: I'm probably responsible for understanding the consequences of no less than 394 Supreme Court cases on the final exam. It's an open book exam, so this is less onerous a task than it could be. But still somewhat un-fun.

And, just to run a gimmick further into the ground... how about a finals-themed Christmas parody song MEDLEY?!?!

Frosty the classmate, didn't work as hard as you
With a brand new casebook he never read, and no doctrine that he knew
But Frosty the classmate, was as lucky as can be
Wishing for the best, went to take the test, and it all was pol-i-cy.

And somewhere in old Frosty's head, an article he'd seen,
Was right on point and Frosty made an A-plus look routine.

Oh, Frosty the classmate, learned a lesson on that day
When the friends who knew, all the work he didn't do
Beat him up and ran away.

Thumpety thump, thump, thumpety thump, thump,
look at Frosty bleed.
Thumpety thump, thump, thumpety thump, thump,
next year he might read.


Rudolph, the Red-Penned Teacher
Had a stack of tests to grade
Last day before the grades due
Instead of working hard he'd played

All of the other teachers
Spent their winter breaks at school
Reading a hundred papers
Curving to the 1L rule

But Rudolph had not read a word
And the break was done
"I'd sure like the students' praise. Maybe I'll give them all A's!"

Then how the students loved him
One girl even baked a cake
"Who cares that you didn't read them?
Every class you teach, we'll take..."


You better watch out, you better not cry
You better not pout, I'm telling you why
Law school grades are coming to town

They're making a curve, checking it twice
One or two A's will have to suffice
Law school grades are coming to town

They see you when you're sleeping, recall what class you missed
And that's what the exam's about, 'cause the teacher can't resist

Oh, you better not brag, you better not guess
Be sure they're not being mailed to your parents' address
Law school grades are coming to town