I haven't taken a course in Evidence, and I'm not sure I remember much Criminal Procedure from 1L fall, so this song parody probably contains gross misstatements of the law. But why should that stop me.

"Admissible" (To the tune of Clay Aiken's "Invisible")

Saw, that gun in your room
But I do not have, a warrant to search
Drugs, are under your bed
A knife in your hand
One more in jail, and I get a raise
So what if there's no crime I know of that you did

[Chorus]

If it was admissible
The jury would send you straight to jail
If it's insuppressible
The trial would be quick
Miranda inaudible
Then I could just frame you for the crime
The promotion would be mine
If I was incompetent
(Wait...I already am)

Saw, you killing a bug
But was it a bug?
Or was it a man?
I keep looking at you
You're washing your hands
Wish that was blood, and not jelly you were washing off
Wish I could find a corpse and blame you for the crime

[Chorus]

If it was admissible
The jury would send you straight to jail
If it's insuppressible
The trial would be quick
Miranda inaudible
Then I could just frame you for the crime
The promotion would be mine
If I was incompetent
(Wait...I already am)

You reach out
Reaching for the poison?
No, it's just the Pringles
And another soda
We have no crime tied to you
But I can't let that be true...

[Repeat Chorus]