In case your Valentine's Day is not quite as sweet as for the Civil Procedure couple below, here's a Property Love (or Love-Gone-Bad) Song to enjoy instead. Sort of.

Property is a bundle of rights
And I want to hold you in my bundle tonight
I want a right to exclude
Anybody else from seeing you in the nude

If I have to I'll adversely possess
The shirt that you're wearing and your lovely new dress
I want to use you exclusively
I own you and you rent me

You're my property
For all of perpetuity
I'm putting a Restrictive Covenant
On anybody else touching you

You're my property
I'll sell you into slavery
I own an Easement
On every part of you

Your new boyfriend knew when he came to town
That I had a covenant and I wrote it down
Implied, reciprocal, and negatively
I have a servitude so you belong to me

He says it's an unreasonable restraint
But I am his lawyer and won't file that complaint
He claims that you've been alienated
But he does not have privity from when it was created

You're my property
For all of perpetuity
I'm putting a Restrictive Covenant
On anybody else touching you

You're my property
I'll sell you into slavery
I own an Easement
On every part of you

I have a simple fee
Unless I sell you, you belong to me

You're my property
For all of perpetuity
I'm putting a Restrictive Covenant
On anybody else touching you

You're my property
I'll sell you into slavery
I own an Easement
On every part of you