Jeremy's Weblog

I recently graduated from Harvard Law School. This is my weblog. It tries to be funny. E-mail me if you like it. For an index of what's lurking in the archives, sorted by category, click here.

Saturday, April 24, 2004

It's request day. See below.

Request #2 comes from Matthew, who asks, "How about a piece on the first couple weeks of the summer firm job?"

Well, I didn't work at a firm last summer, so I can't really help you yet. I can do some imagining though...

The First 2 Weeks Of A Summer Firm Job, The Really Quick Imaginary Diary

Day 1. I arrived. I got a nametag and a free lunch. They gave me a desk. I met Sally, my assistant who I share with 3 other summer associates. One of them already made her pick up laundry. We had a training session.

Day 2. Free lunch again. I met Bob, the partner I'll be working for. He seems like he's pretty wealthy. His assistant is gold-plated. She got his laundry for him twice today. He told me to read up on International Tax Litigation.

Day 3. Free lunch, dinner, and a Broadway show. I didn't do any work today.

Day 4. Another training session. Learned how to fill out a timesheet. Lunch was catered in. We had our first "Thursday night dinner," which is apparently a summer tradition.

Day 5. One of my fellow associates fell off the yacht they took us on and drowned. Oh well.

Day 6. It's Saturday. I'm at home, sleeping.

Day 7. A bunch of my fellow associates and I went and spent a lot of money doing something frivolous, because our summer salaries are so high.

Day 8. Back in the office. I have to write a memo. I asked someone for help. They helped me. I did some Lexis searching. And some Westlaw searching. And had a free lunch.

Day 9. They took us out for a "Tuesday night dinner," which is apparently a summer tradition. I met some more partners at the cocktail party we had in the afternoon. Bob said he's going to take me out golfing tomorrow.

Day 10. Went golfing with Bob. Worked on my memo. Had some more training.

Day 11. Went golfing with Bob again. Handed in my memo. They said it sucked but it doesn't matter. "Thursday night dinner."

Day 12. Called in sick. Firm sent me flowers. They're very nice. My assistant quit because my fellow associate made her clean his apartment.

Day 13. Saturday. No work, of course. Firm paid for lunch anyway.

Day 14. Ate in exclusive restaurant that was too expensive. Polluted a river. Don't remember how.