The first of my final set of exams is tomorrow morning.

I think I'm worse at this than I was two years ago when I was a 1L. This school thing, I mean. My attention span feels shorter. My ability to focus on this stuff. My ability to get concerned and scared and motivated and get myself to really try and learn this stuff. My ability to ignore the part of me that's saying I can fake it and still do okay. I mean, I've done some studying. I know some of this stuff okay. But not really. I'm basically going to fake it. Which is basically what a lot of people do.

Back in high school, I didn't really think about having to like my classes in order to care. I took stuff like AP Physics and AP Chemistry not because I decided I would like them, but because that was what the smart kids did. Smart kids took the hard classes. So I took them. It never crossed my mind to wonder whether I would like them or not. Even now, I have no idea if I liked them. I paid attention, I did the homework, I took the tests. That was what school was.

But then in college they screw with our heads by letting us make choices. By adding an expectation that we should like our classes. It spoils us, really. I totally shouldn't have been able to get credit for stuff like The Economics and Politics of Sports and The Literature of Comedy, or whatever those two classes were called (I can't find them on Princeton's website, so I'm just guessing). They were too interesting. They should have forced us to take stuff like...

Like Civil Procedure. Because then we get to law school, and we're sort of back to high school, where we have to take the classes they tell us to. Although at this point, I picked all my classes. So I really have no one to blame. Oh well. Back to studying.


Also: Per Chris's recommendation, I bought Ben Folds' latest album, Songs for Silverman, last week, and have been listening. I like it. "Landed," "Late," and "Time" are my favorites I think. A lot of them are good. They've been sticking in my head. Check it out if you generally like Ben Folds' stuff.