Jeremy's Weblog

I recently graduated from Harvard Law School. This is my weblog. It tries to be funny. E-mail me if you like it. For an index of what's lurking in the archives, sorted by category, click here.

Thursday, May 15, 2003

The water coming out of the sink in my dorm room this morning is brown. Like the cover of my civil procedure casebook. I know I've been in law school too long when everything reminds me of my casebooks.

By mid-morning, at least a half-dozen people in my building will already have filed a lawsuit against the housing office in response to the brown water, and by tomorrow, there'll be a new course offering scheduled for next semester, called "Dormitory Water Law." By next week, Johnnie Cochran will have been hired to defend the school ("What do the students have against *brown* water? This is discrimination at its worst."), and they'll eventually negotiate a settlement -- perhaps a free bottle of natural spring water and a new toothbrush. In a few years, there'll be a movie about it: "The Water Runs Brown" starring John Travolta as the prosecuting attorney, driven to ensure justice is served for the poor students, Julia Roberts as the crafty up-and-coming law student who never gives up the fight, and Tommy Lee Jones as the housing director, in search of the real culprit, the one-armed man with a bucket of food coloring.